Valentine's Day

I have to admit, I do harbor some negative feelings for Valentine's Day. As a kid, it was such a blast. I loved passing out cards and getting cards from all the kids in my class, and if I was lucky, I even got some conversation hearts. My parents would always leave a little treat on my pillow, with a sweet note telling me how much they loved me. I loved that!

But as I got older, there was a question that I started to dread.

"What are you doing for Valentine's Day?" my friends would ask.

And my answer was always the same: "Nothing."

The holiday made me feel like such a loser.

How I wished I had a guy that would bring me flowers and chocolate and take me out to a romantic dinner. Someday, I thought.

The year that I was nineteen, things started to look up. I actually had a boyfriend! And he had Valentine's Day all planned out for me. I was so excited! But a week before Valentine's Day, he broke up with me. I was heartbroken. Did that mean our Valentine's Day plans were cancelled?

Well, being a good guy, my ex actually still took me out on Valentine's Day, but it wasn't quite what I had imagined. It was different being with that special someone when he didn't want to be my special someone.

Then I met the Real Deal and we were married just before Christmastime. I was determined that we were going to go out on Valentine's Day and have the best date ever.

Valentine's Day came and after we finished our classes for the day, we headed out to a restaurant. But we were told there would be at least an hour and a half wait.

What? But it wasn't even six o clock.

On to the next restaurant. This patten continued until we finally just picked a restaurant and put our names on the waiting list. The wait time was now two hours. We decided to go shop around and then come back. We went and picked out my flower. I had thought I wanted fresh flowers, but now that I was married and knew our budget, I wasn't about to waste it on overpriced flowers that die. Instead, I picked one to use in an arrangement.

Two hours later, we were starving. We couldn't wait to eat. We arrived back at the restaurant only to be told that it would be another forty minutes.

We left and sat in the car wondering what to do. We were starving! We drove around, looking for options. It ended up being so long that we decided to just grab a quick bite to eat. We headed to Fast Food. Now, you have to understand that I loathe fast food. I can't stand hamburgers and the only fast food place I can handle is Taco Bell. Even so, it's not much of a treat, it's more of a desperate measure.

Somehow we ended up at Wendy's. And that was how I spent my first Valentine's Day with my sweetheart. I was so dissapointed. We decided after to never try to go out to eat again on V-day, but instead go out to eat a few days later.

Looking back, I realize how my high expectations just RUINED the holiday for me. So it's not that I don't like Valentine's Day, is more that I don't like all the American traditions that go along with it. And really it's my fault for buying into it and not realizing that I can make my own way and my own traditions.

A few years later, I had a five week old baby and Brad arrived home after eight, just as he always did. I hadn't really given much thought to V-day since I had my precious new baby. So I was completely floored when Brad brought out presents. And boy did he pick them right! He bought me books! My favorite! And chocolate, of course. (Yes, Brad knows the way to my heart!) We sat on our bed, our newborn baby peacefully sleeping in between us and read out loud "Tuck Everlasting". It was one of the most romantic, wonderful dates I have ever been on.

It's so interesting how my perception of what would be romantic and what actually was romantic differed. I think it helped that I didn't have any expectations. (Normally, they are sky high- but I am working on that!)

This year was another one of those "Valentine's Day? Huh?" years since I have had a nasty cold, that has almost knocked me out. Friday came and I realized I hadn't gotten anything for the children. Brad had generously said he would go out for supplies and so I figured he could pick up some jelly hearts for the kids and I would give them a small bag of candy along with a note. I try to do simple things, because I have noticed that the more I do for Noah, the less he seems to appreciate it.

But a few hours later, Noah came home from school with 25 Valentine cards and 20 packs of candy! Yikes. He and Amalie had a fine time digging into the candy. It was at that point, I felt if I got them candy, it would be too much. And after that my brain went completely foggy and I didn't give a second thought to V-day. Well except when Brad brought out presents for me that night. It was so thoughtful. I felt so loved and so bad that I had absolutely nothing for Brad- so I gave him back one of the delicious chocolate bars he had given me.

On Valentine's Day, I felt absolutely horrible. My voice was gone, and I was just so exhausted and headachy. That night, Brad and Amalie made a trip to the store to get more supplies. Noah had the idea that we should "surprise" Brad and Amalie and make them Valentine's Day cards. That was the last thing I wanted to do. All I wanted to do was curl up under my covers and sleep! But Noah was so excited, so I hurriedly cut out two paper hearts and scratched a quick note to Brad and then hid it in his sock drawer.Then Noah wrote one to Brad and hid it.

I collapsed back down onto the bed.

"Mom, what about Amalie?" Noah asked.

I groaned and sat up, my eyes searching the desk. I grabbed an old Valentine's card left over from last year and quickly scrawled "To Amalie, I love you. From Mama." It was actually one that she had been toting around all week in her backpack.

That satisfied Noah, so I laid back down. When Brad and Amalie got home, Noah excitedly told Brad to check his sock drawer. He did, with little Amalie trailing behind. Then we all trooped downstairs to figure out dinner. Noah ran up to Amalie and said "This is for you!" and handed her the card I had written.

Amalie's little face lit up. She asked me to read the card to her over and over. When I told her what it said, she insisted I was wrong and that it said "Happy Valentine's Day card." So I went along with it. The rest of the night, she clutched that little Valentine in her hand. It meant the world to her.

It stunned me that a little card could make a 2 year old so happy. But as Brad and I discussed it, he pointed out that she saw Noah come home with lots of cards, then she saw Daddy get cards, so that was what she wanted. Oh, my sweet Amalie.

What an impression that made on me. I was so happy that she appreciates the little things! How grateful I am that Noah reminded me to make cards for the people I love.