XY Chromosomes

Yep, you read that right! It's a BOY! And as far as we know, he is completely healthy. Which is a tremendous relief. The whole family went in when I had my ultrasound, since we really wanted the children to be a part of it. I worried that Amalie might be a little tough, but actually they were both pretty good. There were toys in the room, so they were much more interested in playing with the toys than looking at sketchy images of the baby. (And I had worked so hard prepping them by watching videos of ultrasounds!)

I thought I really didn't care what sex the baby was. I was a lot more worried that the children would be upset if they didn't get what they wanted. Noah wanted a baby brother and Amalie had also wanted a baby brother . . .up until a week before the ultrasound when suddenly she announced she wanted a baby sister. So, obviously one of them was going to be disappointed. When the ultrasound tech asked if we wanted to know the gender, Brad and I immediately answered "Yes" and then Brad exclaimed "It's a boy!" before the tech said anything.

I have to admit I was a bit disappointed, which surprised me. I guess I had been thinking how great it would be for Amalie to have a sister. Brad made me feel better by mentioning that since I had such a great relationship with my sisters that naturally I would want that for my own daughter.

When we told Amalie that it was a boy- she and Noah were busy playing, she said "No, a sister!" and then five minutes later she was thrilled about her baby brother. She even came up to me the next day and said "Mom, I love my baby brother." That really warmed my heart.

But for me, it has taken a little longer to get used to the fact that we are having a boy. I am starting to get excited and I just keep wondering WHO this little one is. And I needn't worry about Amalie having a friend, because she and Noah are best buds (most of the time) and I was really close to my younger brothers.

I guess the biggest challenge for me at this point is accepting the fact that I will be a mother of THREE! Some days my children will both climb onto my lap, sitting on top of my baby bump, and have a shoving match on my lap. We have mostly remedied that by taking five minute turns . . . but still . . . there is only one of me! And I will have a needy little baby. I guess I am overwhelmed by the fact that not only will I have a newborn who cannot do anything for itself, but on top of that I will be sore, I will think I feel fine and then suddenly walking up the stairs will be too much and my uterus will start to contract painfully, telling me I have overdone it, I will also be hormonal and feel weird, sleep will be a distant memory and I am afraid that with all those stressors I will not enjoy this stage of life.

So, I am trying to prepare the best I can, by helping Amalie and Noah to be as independent as possible, making sure I give each of them alone time each day, and praying with all my heart that Heavenly Father will prepare me so I can ENJOY the JOURNEY. Because truly having a newborn is one of the most spiritual experiences ever. You have this precious, innocent child who has such potential and you have the privelege of raising him. You stare at this child trying to memorize what they look like, only to find that the next day they look a little different. I want to be filled with joy when I look at my child, not with resentment that I can't get any sleep!

So I will trust and I will pray and we will make it through. And I am grateful I still have 4 more months of pregnancy to prepare! Noah was saying "Mom, don't you wish the baby would come on Mother's Day? Wouldn't that be the best present?" But I am content to wait for this little one. I am enjoying having him safe and secure inside and to feel his little kicks and punches- it is like a delicious secret to feel such a sensation.